My God Love Story

I always tell my husband that what made me fall in love with him was his persistence. He courted me with much patience and and never gave up even when I told him to take a hike (many times). The poor guy was a sucker for punishment and kept coming back for more. I was pretty mean, even I would have given up on me. In the end I fell head over in love with the guy who was able to take my nonsense. I know, not many people would have taken what I dished out…I was pretty messed up back then. His PERSISTENCE won me over.

Blog hop week 2 in my current Bible Study. Am I messing up my kids by Lysa TerKeurst. She speaks about getting back to our first love. Here is a short excerpt from her book after referring to the typical love stories from movies we watch. We see the mess ups and then the reunion of love at the end.

“Why are we so moved by these love stories? I believe it is because God designed our hearts for an eternal love story, our love story with Jesus.”

So here follows My God Story. I thought about my life and then the book of Hosea and God’s persistent love stuck out. Yet another reason why I love the Lord. His PERSISTENCE won me over as well.

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I was doing a bit of research on Hosea and stumbled across an awesome blog post that expounds on persistent love. Here is a link if you are interested in reading it.

http://quenchnot.wordpress.com/2012/03/15/love-is-persistent/

I have extracted some paragraphs from this post that eloquently summarizes my thoughts in Hosea.

Hosea’s wayward wife and unfaithful children (examined in the first three chapters) would, in turn, serve as a metaphor for God’s turbulent relationship with his bride.

Chapter two of Hosea really is the “meat” of this account, as God partakes in a long and emotional discourse regarding his companion. The Lord begins with rather harsh words, in which one can sense his feelings of rejection and scorn.

In Hosea 2:2a, God says, “Rebuke your mother, rebuke her, for she is not my wife, and I am not her husband.”

Israel, through her adultery, had broken her marital bonds with Jehovah, and he was sure to let her know about it. God, however, only intends to chasten Israel and not divorce her. In fact, in spite of her habitual transgression, God’s sole desire is to love her and be in unbroken fellowship.

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I look back over my life thus far. A time of growing up in church under the Word and later in my teen years accepting the Lord as Savior. Thereafter back sliding and literally like Gomer, prostituting myself in the world even though I was the bride of Christ. It definitely hurt the Lord as I played the harlot but He waited… chastened me and as I fell apart I found myself returning to my first love. Details of my life of harlotry and how I returned to God can read here in my previous blog post.

https://sabrinaebert.wordpress.com/2014/06/08/damaged-goods-to-trophy-of-grace/

Ultimately, I love how Lysa tells us to get back to our first love. Stop getting so preoccupied with life…the kids, the work and the umpteen problems inbetween. God wants us in a relationship with Him… An intimate one. So don’t forget to sit under the Word and communicate with Him daily.

It’s tough being a mum

Current study and the reason for this post…Am I messing up my kids? By Lysa TerKeurst.

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As I write this…I’m tired. Physically worn out from a night with a newborn (Naomi, 1 week old) who had tummy problems. She came via a scheduled caesarean (first pregnancy was an emergency caesarean so wanted to avoid the complications I experienced the first time round) so you can imagine that I’m not a 100% well and still in recovery. Solely nursing without bottle feeds and rocking a little baby just after a op is draining. Our verse this week is for restoration from psalms 23:3 and boy do I need it.

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I love how Lysa describes how she oscillates between “Good mum”… “Bad mum”!!!

I find myself doing the very same thing. I have those times when everything is running smoothly and I feel as though I got a handle on things and then… BAM, it changes that quickly. I loose my temper, I shout…I go a little crazy, maybe too crazy and then when all the tears are shed and my almost 3 year old daughter who is all spent crying…I am immediately remorseful. I want to go back and change things. I know I could of handled it better. If I had only taken a moment to breathe, calm down a bit before reacting things could have turned out differently.

Now that Leah is talking her individuality is evident. Alex my husband and I have enforced rules and we stick to it. Like her toys need to be tidied away before getting something else. Most of the time she is compliant but then there are those times when Leah crosses her hands over her chest with a look of absolute indignation and responds “Nein, Ich will nicht” (German to English translation “No, I don’t want to”).

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What scares me most as a mother is that…yes it’s tough now. Caring for my babies who are incapable to prepare meals, bathe and feed themselves is okay. It’s tiring but I have control but a shift is taking place. I see it with Leah. She is particular with what she wants to eat and wear and the things she says just blows me away. I’m loosing control and it will get worse as they grow older. All I can do is pray. Pray that I get them grounded firmly in the Word. Pray that they make the right decisions. Pray that when they make mistakes, they are able to dust it off, pick themselves up and move forward. Pray that Alex and I are good role models that exhibit Christ in all our actions. Clearly, I’m making mistakes but I should be able to fess up when I am wrong and ask for forgiveness. I’m learning right now. Learning that my perfectionist ways needs to give way. That happy kids are better than laundry done or worrying about dishes piled in the kitchen sink and a spotless home! The laughing and running around and enjoying my children should be priority instead of getting all riled up that things are not on schedule.

I realize God is indeed teaching me patience, tolerance and long suffering through my girls. I’m blessed to have them and yeah I will mess up, no doubt but if I start the day with prayer and keep those lines of communication open throughout the day it will get better…it will be manageable!